Do you ever have one of those days when everyone seems to be thinner, prettier, participating in an extreme sport, an expert on a happy marriage, while balancing the raising of the two best kids ever and a perfect home that is going to be shot for an interior design magazine next week after their guest appearance on a gourmet cooking show?
Today is one of those days for me.
My desk is a mess, my children (at least the ones at home) are fighting, my husband has banned all Valentine’s Day activities and my “skinny” jeans are making me feel fat. Projects have piled up as I have wasted too much time on the internet pretending to work, but not really working. I am just not measuring up.
My friends are all making great strides in their personal and professional pursuits, while I remain queen of the underachievers. I think for the most part I am creative, giving, a hard worker, and trying to follow my passion. The earthly yardstick still says “loser.” Well, maybe just my bank account says “loser”.
I am trying really hard not to make life about the money and the stuff. I am trying to banish to the back of the closet the woman inside me who wants to win awards and be the best. (You can’t be the best unless there is some sort of measurement and comparison involved, you know. We are God’s unique masterpiece, remember? No comparisons allowed.) I am trying to live in grace and love and light and ignore the “Housewives” (pick a city) who have it “all” even though some of them seem to be the nastiest people on earth.
In The Promise, when Sam asked God why there are good people who starve and criminals who drive Bentley’s, I never thought of the earthly versus eternal yardstick. He made it clear that He doesn’t measure people by stuff, nor does anyone once you pass away. So why do we?
Oh, and there is also the concept of a blip here on earth and eternity on the other side that made me pause. Eternity is a very long time.
I do want to measure up eternally. I want to walk through those pearly gates, head held high knowing I made a difference here. I want high fives and well done’s. I also want new clothes and an annual vacation here.
So, I have made the choice to lead with love and hope for the best. If I don’t get a vacation here, I hope I spend eternity in paradise in some really great clothes after participating in their version of extreme sports where everyone is a winner and everyone gets a chance at a guest spot on the gourmet channel.
I’m liking this eternal yardstick more and more!